Sunday, March 25, 2012

Chocolate covered raisins and crib hoppin'

Time has truly flown by, here in Merrifield-land.
Suddenly Christopher Robin will be TWO months old in three days. I can't believe it. I feel like we just had him.
Of course it doesn't help, that he truly is a dream baby. Yes he still wakes up for feedings at 12 and 4am, but compared to Ben at that age, he's amazing! He is on a great schedule, and truly has a precious little personality. He's smiling and holding his head up so well. Mommy is so proud!

Speaking of Ben...That stinker gets cuter every day. It's unbelievable. He also gets in more trouble every day :) That little boy throws a temper tantrum when the wind blows. I find myself having a hard time navigating this new "Ben". I realize, as with most things with toddlers, that this is a phase, but dang it, it's a tough one! But it is such a reminder to me that we are all a bunch of sinners. I often times want to make his actions all about ME. "What am I doing wrong?", but I'm learning through prayer and lots of time spent in the word lately, that I have to take myself out of the equation. Ben having tantrums isn't about me. It's about a two year old, trying to communicate, and getting mad when he doesn't get chocolate covered raisins for breakfast. It's hard to believe in the midst of it, but it's truly that simple. He's a tiny little sinner, who wants me to know he's mad for not being able to eat the chocolate covered raisins.
Aside from tantrums, Ben has also been keeping us quite busy by crawling out of his crib. That kid can scale his crib and hop down to the floor in 10 seconds flat. It's impressive. But also dangerous. It looks like it's time to transition him to a big boy bed. Chris and I can officially kiss our alone time good bye ;)

The only positive that has come from Benny's crib hoppin' is that my parents must have heard the desperation in my voice in our recent phone calls, because they immediately setting about plans to come see us at the end of April. Thank you Jesus!!! We need some Mimsey and Daddy Jim. Ben will be so excited to see them!
And who knows, maybe Chris and I can go on a date, that doesn't involve a splash pad or the Shamu show....
That's all for now folks. I hear my boss (Christopher Robin) waking up.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Fly to Jesus

Today is Big Ben's birthday. Saturday will be the 7th anniversary of his death. This has been a pretty tough week for me. I think I'm struggling with so many emotions, but most of all I'm grieving that Ben will never meet either of my precious babies on this earth. I am so blessed that Chris and Ben were such good friends, and that we share a common grief during this week, in losing someone who was so precious to us. Normally I've got a lot to say, but this week has found me quiet and sad. This week I've felt like I'm sitting in church with all my dearest friends, surrounded by love and encouragement as everyone sings songs of worship. But I find myself unable to even form the words, much less sing, because my heart is so broken. So I'll just listen, and praise the Lord that Ben's suffering came to an end 7 years ago.

Untitled Hymn-Chris Rice

Weak and wounded sinner
Lost and left to die
O, raise your head, for love is passing by
Come to Jesus
Come to Jesus
Come to Jesus and live!

Now your burden's lifted
And carried far away
And precious blood has washed away the stain, so
Sing to Jesus
Sing to Jesus
Sing to Jesus and live!

And like a newborn baby
Don't be afraid to crawl
And remember when you walk
Sometimes we
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus and live!

Sometimes the way is lonely
And steep and filled with pain
So if your sky is dark and pours the rain, then
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus and live!

O, and when the love spills over
And music fills the night
And when you can't contain your joy inside, then
Dance for Jesus
Dance for Jesus
Dance for Jesus and live!

And with your final heartbeat
Kiss the world goodbye
Then go in peace, and laugh on Glory's side, and
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus and live!